Building Character: Boldness

This week we are talking about BOLDNESS vs. fearfulness.

Our eldest son needs no encouragement towards greater boldness!  To quote Ogden Nash, he is "as brave as a barrel full of bears"!  I, on the other hand, tend towards being shy and fearful.  This is an area I pray about and sadly, where I regularly fail.  So if you or your child is like me, the emphasis will be on just saying something... anything!  Just speak the Lord's name out loud and do it with as much confidence as you can muster!  If your child is like my son, emphasize being confident in the Lord and not in our own selves.

BOLDNESS vs. fearfulness

Confidence that what I have to say or do is true, right, and just in the sight of God.

Acts 4:29 - "Lord... grant that Your bond-servants may speak Your word with all confidence."

This week's Bible Story:  Acts 4 - The Boldness of Peter and John
In chapter 3, Peter and John healed a lame man at the temple.  There were many witnesses to this miracle, and the apostles were very clear that they were able to perform this act of healing because of the power given to them by Jesus Christ.  They then preached a sermon calling all of the Jews to repent of their sin and to be converted to Christ.

Their proclamations about Jesus came to the attention of the Jewish rulers, and Peter and John were put into prison for the night.  The next day, they were brought before a large crowd of Jewish leaders for questioning.  They were specifically asked, "By what power or what name have you done this?"  Peter, being filled with the Holy Spirit answered, "By the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, whom you crucified, whom God raised from the dead, by Him this man stands here before you whole."  He also said, "Nor is there salvation in any other, for there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved."

The rulers marveled at the boldness of Peter and John.  With the man who had been lame standing before them, healthy and whole, they couldn't say anything against them.  They decided that the best they could do would be to severely threaten them.  Verse 18 says, "So they called them and commanded them not to speak at all nor teach in the name of Jesus."  Peter and John said that they would have to obey God rather than men and despite the threats made to them, went on their way, boldly proclaiming Jesus, His death, resurrection, and the salvation available through Him.

Discussion:

• What sort of persecution did Peter and John face?  Did that stop them?
• What sort of persecution might we face?  Should that stop us?
• Peter and John were NOT bold to speak out about political or personal views.  They were speaking about a matter of life or death!  Do you think they would have had the same kind of boldness for things that were less important?
• Peter and John were filled with the Holy Spirit and that seemed to help them with boldness.  Do we have this today?  
• What are some specific times and places we can speak Jesus' name with boldness?  (Role-playing might be a good idea.)
• How should we handle it if we are ever asked to stop speaking Jesus' name?

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Building Character: Availability

This week we are talking about AVAILABILITY vs. self-centeredness.

In weeks past, we have discussed Attentiveness and Alertness, which are both character qualities that help us learn to put others ahead of ourselves.  Availability focuses on the same thing: others.

When I think of availability, I think of giving of my time.  If my time is scheduled down to the very minute, there will not be much left for spontaneous, and much needed service.  Time is a valuable, and limited resource, so we must learn to use it well.  I am blessed to have more freedom and flexibility with my time than many other people, but I need to make sure that I am using my "extra time" for the glory of God and for serving, not just for my own gratification.  

The bottom line is that I need to always keep the proper perspective.  I'm sure most of you are familiar with this cliche, but it is simple and makes the point well.  My life needs to be ordered in this way:
1. Jesus
2. Others
3. You

And with that, you get JOY.  What a nice, simple way to keep our priorities straight, and it is easy for our kids to remember too.


AVAILABILITY vs. self-centeredness

Making my own schedule and priorities secondary to the wishes of those I am serving.

Philippians 2:20-21 - "For I have no one else of kindred spirit who will be genuinely concerned for your welfare.  For they all seek their own interests, not those of Christ Jesus."

Doesn't that verse make you feel sad for Paul?  The only person he felt like he could trust to send to the brethren in Philippi was Timothy.  Let's admonish ourselves and our children to never let the same be said of us.  Let us always remember that nothing else in this life matters one single bit.  Nothing else but Jesus Christ.  And EVERYTHING we do, is all about Him.  If we are so busy seeking our own interests that we are not able to serve Him and His saints, then we need to cut some things out of our lives. 

Note to Mothers:  By serving your husband and children, you are serving Christ.  I am fully aware that there are times in our lives where being faithful in those two realms of service require ALL of our time and energy.  If that is where you are at this time, then know that you are doing Holy Work and continue serving faithfully.  Do not feel guilty if you are unable to keep up with Sister So-and-so, especially if she is in a different stage in life or has different circumstances.  God does not ask you to do what she is doing, He only asks you to be faithful in the tasks He has given to you.

This week's Bible story:  Jesus Makes Himself Available to the Multitudes
Mark 6:30-44

Jesus was having a difficult time.  He had just found out about the death of His cousin, and faithful servant of God, John the Baptist.  And John's death particularly distressing because he had been beheaded for offending the king when he said that he had no right to the wife he had married.  Jesus loved John and was surely mourning the loss while He also had to comfort the other disciples.  Jesus said to them, "Come away to a deserted place and rest a while."  Verse 31 tells us that they had been so busy lately that "they did not even have time to eat."

So they went away into a boat by themselves, but the multitudes saw them and ran to meet Jesus.  Jesus had been hoping for a little downtime with His disciples.  No doubt He wanted to rest, get nourishment and meditate before getting back to work, but it was not to be.  Verse 34 says Jesus "was moved with compassion for them, because they were like sheep not having a shepherd.  So He began to teach them many things." 

While it is not the focus of today's study, you can go on to talk as much or as little as you like about what happened next, which was the miracle when Jesus fed over 5,000 people!  Jesus saw the needs of the multitudes, set aside His personal wants and wishes, and showed them compassion.  He took time for them, teaching, healing and serving them.  Jesus is a wonderful example to us of pouring out our lives to glorify God and serve others.

Discussion:

• Young children are so naturally self-centered, that I think they need help learning what things they are doing for themselves and what things they do for others.  Bring it to their attention and offer praise when you see them serving others - helping with a chore, assisting a sibling, cleaning up after themselves, etc...
• I think it is also helpful to point out to them when they are being self-centered.  For instance, we have a child that likes to dictate how the other child can play and always wants things to be "his way".  Sometimes I question him saying, "Are you playing that way to make your brother happy or yourself happy?" Sometimes they need a little help figuring out a way to play where they can both be happy.  Don't think it is impossible to teach siblings how to serve one another.  What better way to learn than at home? 
• Think of a service project you can do together.  It can be as simple as coloring pictures to send to someone that is sick or suffering.  It could be visiting a friend that is shut-in or a nursing home. Try to find some way you can go out of your way to show compassion and service to others.
• Just like Jesus, we need to make sure we always take the time to share the gospel with someone that is interested in the message.  Talk about ways that you can do this.  Pray for God to send you someone that is looking for the gospel.  Pray for God to help you speak His name with boldness when you are interacting with other people.  Take the time to talk about Jesus throughout each day with your children.  Remember, they need to hear the gospel too!

Next week, BOLDNESS!

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Building Character: Attentiveness

This week we are talking about ATTENTIVENESS vs. unconcern.

Attentiveness is sandwiched right between Alertness and Availability, which I think is useful because these three qualities are so much about putting others before ourselves.  And I don't know about you, but that is something that we really have to work on around here.

ATTENTIVENESS vs. unconcern

Showing the worth of a person by giving undivided attention to their words and emotions.

Hebrews 2:1 - "For this reason, we must pay much closer attention to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away from it."

This lesson is two-fold -
First, we need to keep our gaze firmly fixed upon Jesus, our Savior. 
Second, "regard one another as more important than yourselves".  
Philippians 2:3
(I think I know our newest memory verse!!)

Easy to say, harder to do.  How often do we mothers just brush right past a child trying to tell us something because we deem it unimportant?  I know it is hard.  I know it very well, but I think we have to be conscientious about stopping what we are doing (when at all possible), kneeling down and looking into our child's face while they are talking to us.  We need to stop and sit in a chair and take a small child onto our lap, carefully listening, and looking into their faces.  Because if we want them to share the "big stuff" with us later on, we have to be willing to listen to the "little stuff" (that is really big stuff in their eyes) right now.   More is caught than taught.  If we want our children to learn to pay attention to Jesus and to us, we need to take the time to pay attention to them.  

And more than ever, we need to be willing to put away the distractions of technology in order to listen.  With mobile devices sending constant interruption, please show your child that they are more important.  In days gone by, if the phone rang at dinner time, most families would just let it ring, after all, dinner with the family was more important and phone calls could wait.  Reclaim family meals by banishing ALL screens from the table.  Do not answer your phone, your texts, your e-mails, etc... during family meals.  For the sake of your children and your marriage, reserve that hour for face to face time and listen to the voices of wisdom sharing with you that this is one of the most important ways to destruction-proof your family.  Show the worth of the people you love the most by giving them your UNDIVIDED attention during mealtimes. 

This week's Bible story:  Mary loved Jesus
Luke 10:39 - "And she (Martha) had a sister called Mary, who also sat at Jesus’ feet and heard His word."

John 12:1-7 - "Then Mary took a pound of very costly oil of spikenard, anointed the feet of Jesus, and wiped His feet with her hair. And the house was filled with the fragrance of the oil."

Mary, Martha, and Lazarus were brother and sisters living in the town of Bethany and they were some of Jesus' closest friends during His life on earth.  Mary, in particular, showed her devotion to the Lord on two different occasions.  Mary gave Jesus her undivided attention and did not let the cares of the household, or concerns about money distract her from what was most important, which was Jesus himself. 

I do not own any spikenard, but I do own some incredibly lovely Arnica Massage Oil, so to demonstrate what Mary did, I rubbed each child's feet with the oil and looked into their faces while I did it.  I demonstrated giving undivided attention with each of them, getting very close face to face, shielding our faces with my hands to help bring them into focus on my face.  I smiled with them and said how much I loved them.  When we reviewed this lesson two days later, they asked me if I would rub their feet with the oil again.  I was so happy to do it!  

Discussion: 

• What does it mean to have undivided attention?  (Demonstrate this in a physical way.)
• We cannot sit at Jesus' feet because He has gone up into heaven already, but in what ways can we give Jesus our undivided attention?  (Paying attention during worship and Bible classes, in prayer, being devoted to reading His word, etc...)
• What can happen if we do not pay attention to God's word?  (discuss Hebrews 2:1)
• How can we be attentive to others?  Role play a situation and put it into practice.

(For us, our children really need practice being attentive when other adults speak to them.  We practice shaking hands, smiling, saying hello, and answering questions.  We try to prepare them when we will be going into situations where lots of adults will want to talk to them, such as before a worship assembly.  We are making some progress, but still have a ways to go.) 

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Building Character: Alertness

 As a family, we are studying a character trait each week, and are beginning with the Fruits of the Spirit.  This week we are moving beyond the Fruits of the Spirit and will be working through the remaining character traits in alphabetical order, but you can go back and read Love, Joyfulness, Peaceable, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness and Gentleness and Self-Control.  If you want more information on the nuts and bolts of what we are doing, you can read how to get started on this post.

This week we are talking about ALERTNESS vs. unawareness.
It is not so much about caf. vs. decaf, but is really about working towards not being so self-consumed that we miss important things going on, especially in regards to the people we are called to serve.  Again, I think I get more out of these studies than my children.  And that is ok.  "More is caught than taught", so as I work onto making my character what it needs to be, hopefully my children will see and will imitate.

ALERTNESS vs. unawareness

Being aware of what is happening around me so I can have the right response.

Mark 14:38 - "Keep watching and praying that you may not come into temptation; the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak."

I believe each family's struggles with alertness could look a little different.  It could be:

• a child that tends to have her head in the clouds most of the time - a daydreamer
• a child that is intensely focused on a task, but ignores other important things
• an introverted child (or an introverted parent)
• a mother that is so distracted by her phone/facebook/blogging that she is unaware of what is truly happening in her home and with her children

*ouch*

By the way, if that last one is you, you may be blessed to read this article by Ann Voskamp.   It's a little wordy and long, but be sure you read to the end.  There are some real gems to take away.  One of which I have put on a sticky on my computer:  "There is never any fruit without FOCUS."  And another that is now on my Home Management Notebook, "Habits are hard, but they make life easy."

Indeed.  It is something I have to constantly work on with myself.  Because I have a tendency to be all four of those things I listed above.  And a few of my "apples" are not far from the tree if you know what I mean. 

This week's Bible Story:  Jesus in the garden with his disciples
Mark 14:32-42

On the night when Jesus was arrested, he went with his disciples to the garden of Gethsemane.  Jesus was greatly troubled and said, "My soul is very sorrowful, even to death. Remain here and watch".  Jesus knew that His death was imminent and it grieved Him terribly.  He knew what was coming and spent the time in prayer to His Father asking, "Abba, Father, all things are possible for you. Remove this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will."  Jesus was preparing to take upon Himself the sins of the entire world.  He was preparing for an agonizing death, and for a period of total separation from His Father.  It was almost more than He could bear.  He asked Peter, James, and John to stay and pray, urging them to, "Watch and pray that you may not enter into temptation."  But they could not stay awake.  Three times Jesus found them sleeping.  It seems they did not realize what an important moment in time this was.  They were unaware.

Finally it was too late.  Judas came to betray Jesus with a kiss, and only a little later, Peter fell to temptation and denied Jesus three times.  If only Peter had stayed alert and prayed with Jesus.  If only he had been alert so as to have the right response.  If only... but it was too late.  

Our lesson teaches us just how important to redeem the time we are given and to be alert to what is happening in the moment.  If we waste important moments in our lives because we are unaware, we will not be able to get them back.  We must always be watching and praying.

Discussion:

• Did Peter, James, and John know what was about to happen to Jesus?
• Did Peter know that he was about to be tempted to sin?  (He should have!  Jesus warned him!)
• Did Peter listen to Jesus when he said, "Watch and pray"?  
• Sometimes we will have moments in our life where we are given a warning to "Watch and pray", what should we do when someone gives us that kind of wise counsel?
•  The disciples were very tired.  Did Satan stop tempting them just because they were sleepy?  It is hard to do the right thing when we are tired, but we still need to obey.

Remember, "there is never any fruit without focus".  Keep your eyes fixed upon Jesus.  He is the only thing that matters in this life.  The only thing.  Don't let Satan distract you and catch you unaware!

Proverbs 3:5-6 - "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding;  In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths."

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Building Character: Self-Control

 As a family, we are studying a character trait each week, and are beginning with the Fruits of the Spirit.  This week we are finishing up the Fruits of the Spirit, but you can go back and read Love, Joyfulness, Peaceable, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness and Gentleness.  If you want more information on the nuts and bolts of what we are doing, you can read how to get started on this post.

This week we are talking about one our greatest challenges - having SELF-CONTROL.

I find this very interesting:  In Titus 2, Paul gives lists of things Titus needs to teach to different groups of people.  We are probably all very familiar with the list of 8 things older women are to teach younger women in verses 4 and 5 and one of those things is self-control.  Older men are given a list of six things, one of which is self-control.  Older women are given a list of four things and are the only ones not urged to work on their self-control.  And the young men are given only one exhortation:  "Likewise, urge the younger men to be self-controlled."

My husband says this is because working on self-control is a full-time job for a young man.  He also said that we could spend an entire month JUST talking about self-control if I felt it would be helpful for our two boys.  We talk about self-control many times a day in our house, so this week's lesson will be a helpful focus, but the practice of it will likely continue for my sons for a lifetime.

SELF-CONTROL   vs. self-will

Ruling over my spirit; bringing my heart and actions into line with God's will.

Proverbs 22:28 - "A man without self-control is like a city broken down, without walls."

Self-control is really one of those blanket character traits.  When we have it, we are able to restrain all of those bad character qualities such as anger, selfishness, lust, self-pity, meanness, fearfulness, covetousness, etc...   By ruling over our spirits, we are able to will ourselves to take on the Fruits of the Spirit.  And for most of us, developing self-control will take a lifetime.  We start out as babies, totally unable to rule over our spirits.  If a baby is hungry and tired, they are going to fuss and cry, and at that age, it is to be expected.  But when a four year old is hungry and tired, we expect a little more self-control.  We expect that child in just a few years to learn to wait just a little bit longer and to do it without ugly meltdowns.  We also expect a four year old to learn that the needs of others come before his own.  When told no, he ought to have enough rule over his spirit not to have a tantrum about it.

WARNING:  Controversial parenting advice below!!!  
We are not "time out people" in the traditional sense.  It is because I feel very strongly that there is a bigger picture.  I do not believe just sending a child off by himself to throw his fit is an effective way to teach self-control.  Starting with toddlers, I will sit the melting down child in my lap and gently restrain, urging with a calm voice, "Get some self-control" until he yields.  If the fit only escalates and there is further rebellion, we use negative consequences*.  Our four year old now has enough rule over his spirit from all of that practice on my lap, that he can be told to sit by himself and "Get some self-control" and have it in a few minutes, though sometimes we still need those negative consequences*.  This way there is no intrinsic reward for throwing a fit.  And I think sometimes we don't realize that being allowed to throw crying, kicking tantrums without restraint is rewarding self-will.  Of course, you need to look at your individual children and your family to determine what will work for you, but that is how I begin teaching self-control at a very young age.

I really believe starting young with self-control is important, because if you choose to just "ride out" the toddler tantrum years, your child will eventually learn that throwing kicking screaming fits is socially unacceptable and they will stop.  But they will start to practice the subtle, more dangerous forms of self-will including sulking and emotional manipulation.  I think we all know adults that have little more self-control than a child and it is not a pretty thing.  Those people struggle in their marriages, in the workplace, and with friends.  Yes, it is much happier for our children if they begin practicing self-control while they are young.

*Negative consequences:  Proverbs 22:15, Proverbs 29:15
End of controversial parenting advice.

Now preaching to the parents:
How is your self-control?  Kids will test it and challenge it more than anything.  Do you "lose it" from time to time with them?  I'm going to say two things that I want you to take to heart.  Let these words rattle around in your head when you are called upon to discipline your child and hopefully they will help you maintain self-control in that tough moment -

1.  Never, never, never spank in anger.

2.  Training your children is a time where there is no place for anger.  NO PLACE! 

As I say to my son, "Put all of that anger out of your heart."  Rule over your spirit and get control of yourself before you lose it with your kids.  Because if you regularly lose your temper with them, you will lose their hearts.  You can't just teach about self-control, you have to live it.  I cannot stress enough how important this is.

Ok, I'll stop preaching now and get on with our Bible story.  I hope we can still be friends.  :)

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

This week's Bible story:  Luke 4:1-13
Satan Tempts Jesus

For forty days, Jesus endured intense temptation in the wilderness.  He was alone and he was fasting.  Even in his weak physical state, he endured every temptation Satan sent His way without giving in.  I read the entire account out loud, but since the first temptation is by far the easiest for young children to understand, I dwelt upon Satan tempting Jesus to turn the stones into bread more than the others.  Sometimes there is a misconception that Jesus endured these forty days of temptation and then Satan left Him alone, but verse 13 says, "Now when the devil ended every temptation, he departed from Him until an opportune time."  Even Jesus was plagued by the devil all of His life on earth.  And we can see that Satan looks for our weakest moments.  We can't let down our guard!

Discussion:

• How do you feel just before lunch time?  What if you felt hungry like that for a whole day with no food or snacks?  That is the way Jesus felt for forty days, and that is longer than a month!  Jesus wasn't just hungry the way you feel before lunch, He was weak and sick with hunger.  How much do you think He wanted that bread?  And yet He had the self-control to tell Satan, "No!"  
• How does Jesus answer Satan each time?  (With scripture!  He knows the power of God's words!  We can use God's words to help us have the self-control we need.)
• If a man without self-control is like a city with broken down walls, what is a man that HAS self-control like?  (A strong city)  Will Satan be able to get in to that man's city?  
• We need to have a strong mind in order to have self-control.  We need to be able to do the hard things and make ourselves stop before we do bad things, and instead, do the good things.  Jesus was able to rule over His spirit and we need to work very, very hard so we can do the same.  
• Role play some scenarios that you know would tempt your child's ability to have self-control.  Urge your child to be a "strong city with strong walls" and have them come up with positive and self-controlled reactions to tempting situations.
• My son asked about Samson and if he was a person that had self-control because he was so strong.  We took a little tangent discussing how Samson was physically strong, but weak when it came to self-control.  His dying act of bringing down the pagan temple with his own strength is a good illustration of those broken down walls that come from a lack of self-control.  
• Discuss that the work of learning self-control will be their job for the rest of their lives. 

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Building Character: Gentleness

 As a family, we are studying a character trait each week, and are beginning with the Fruits of the Spirit. We are just getting started, so up until now, we have talked about Love, Joyfulness, Peaceable, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, and Faithfulness.  If you want more information on the nuts and bolts of what we are doing, you can read how to get started on this post.

As we strive to put on Christ and imitate His character, we take up the challenge of adopting a spirit of GENTLENESS.

Matthew 11:28 - 30 -

“Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.  Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”

GENTLENESS vs. Harshness

Showing personal care and concern in meeting the need of others.

Philippians 4:5 - "Let your gentleness be known to all men."

This definition gave me pause.  It isn't the definition that first came to my mind, but the more I looked into it, the more I came to agree with it.  According to dictionary.com, the first definition of gentleness was "kindly".  When I looked up the Greek word used in the fruits of the spirit, I noticed that the same word was more often translated "kindness".  Gentleness is usually considered to be a feminine trait, and indeed, I'm sure it comes more naturally for most females, but it should be encouraged in our young men too.  Both Jesus and the apostles were described as gentle, and Paul admonishes Timothy that, "A servant of the Lord must not quarrel but be gentle to all, able to teach, patient, in humility correcting those who are in opposition".  (2 Timothy 2:24-25)

What a challenge we have on our hands to teach our children to have the strength of the Lord, and to speak out with boldness, but yet to be clothed in humility and to speak with kindness and gentleness.

I first taught my boys about gentleness when they were infants.  Instead of roughly grabbing at an animal's fur, I showed them how to softly stroke and animal speaking to them in low tones, "gentle, gentle".  When they are around an infant, I encourage gentleness - speaking and singing gently and softly holding the baby's hand (if her mama says it is alright!).  These things do not come naturally to my boys.

Gentle speech does not come always naturally either.  They imitate what they hear from their father and I which is usually gentle, but when the monster of selfishness takes over their hearts or anger overcomes them, the harsh words and actions come out.  We remind them of this verse:

Proverbs 15:1 - "A gentle answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger."

This week's Bible story:  Luke 10:25-37
The parable of the Good Samaritan.
So often, we skip right to the story, but I think we can find great insight for parenting in Jesus' gentle dialogue with the lawyer that was questioning him.  Jesus answer's his question with a question, gently leading the lawyer towards the correct answer.  Even when the lawyer continued to question, Jesus answered him with patience, leading him to the Truth like the Good Shepherd that He is.

When the lawyer asked, "What shall I do to inherit eternal life?"  Jesus told him that correct answer was:

• "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your strength, and with all your mind" 
• "You shall love your neighbor as yourself”

Let us encourage our children to remember these two commandments.  If we do these, then we will be His faithful disciples.

When the lawyer further questions Jesus, asking, "Who is my neighbor?"  Jesus answered with the parable of the Good Samaritan.  Emphasize the personal, loving care and concern the Samaritan showed to the man who had been robbed and beaten.

• When he saw him, he had compassion
• He went to him and cleaned and bandaged his wounds
• He set him on his own donkey (meaning that he now walked beside)
• He brought him to an inn where he personally took care of him
• He payed for the man's stay at the end from his own money

Jesus says that THIS is what it means to love our neighbor and that we must do likewise.  Humbling isn't it?  "You shall love your neighbor as yourself." 

Do you, like me, feel the sting of some of those times that you failed to show love to a neighbor?  Maybe I seem so very holy by the things that I write on my blog, but I'm not.  I fail.  I try, but I fail just like everyone else.  One time stands out to me so, so strongly.  I was getting my children out of the car to go grocery shopping when a woman came to me in the parking lot and said her car had broken down and she asked if she could borrow a cell phone.  My immediate answer was that no, I didn't have one.  Because I hadn't had one up until a few weeks before and I forgot I had one now.  And then I remembered that I did have one, but that it is my emergencies only phone where I pay by the minute and I said, "No, not really."  And she walked away.  And I felt terrible because I remembered that for years, I, myself had been living without a cell phone with an unreliable car.  It could have so easily been me, stranded in a parking lot having to beg for the use of a phone.  And what would I have wished someone would have done for me?

Well, the story doesn't end there.  The woman asked another lady across the parking lot that was now loading groceries in the back of her car.  The kindly woman said, "Oh of course, here you go."  And she handed over her phone while she finished unloading her cart.  By this time, I had unbuckled my children and was heading to the store.  Since it was Aldi, we had a quarter ready to put in so we could borrow a cart.  As I passed by, the woman that lent the cell phone called out to me and said, "Here, take my cart."  I said, "Oh, I'm really alright, I have a quarter."  She said, "I want you to have it," and wished me a good day with a smile.  I felt those burning coals of fire on my head.  (And I know she hadn't meant them that way!)  I felt so very small as I did my shopping that day.

Who had been the Good Samaritan?  Not me!  I was the one professing to serve God like the priest and the Levite, but hardened my heart when asked to share with a person in need.  I don't know why my initial reaction was so closed and selfish.  Fear?  Probably.  I think it revealed a lot about my heart.  I know I have learned my lesson though.  I'm sure God will provide another test for me someday.  I pray that I have enough love in my heart to share with my neighbor by then.

Discussion:

• Who is your neighbor? 
• What sort of things can we do to help a person in need?
• With children, I think we need to also emphasize that if they see a child in need that they can help, they should do it.  But if they see an adult that needs help, they should get mama or daddy to help them help.  You just can't be too careful when it comes to safety and your children.
• When you are in a conflict with someone, what can you do to be a peacemaker?  (Use gentleness - both words and actions!)
• It would be helpful to role-play some situations for this.  In our house, the perpetual problem is both children wanting the same toy.  Over and over again, we talk them through whether the toy can be shared, traded, or if the two can take turns.  I'm hoping all of this practice with one another will help them handle other playmates someday!

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Building Character: Faithful

As a family, we are studying a character trait each week, and are beginning with the Fruits of the Spirit. We are just getting started, so up until now, we have talked about Love, Joyfulness, Peaceable, Patience, Kindness, and Goodness.  If you want more information on the nuts and bolts of what we are doing, you can read how to get started on this post.

 

This week's character quality is Faithfulness.  Not so much having faith, but being faithful, which is more akin to loyalty.  We'll do faith later on.  :)  Read with me this beautiful verse about our amazing God:

"Therefore know that the Lord your God, He is God, the FAITHFUL God who keeps covenant and mercy for a thousand generations with those who love Him and keep His commandments."  
- Deuteronomy 7:9

In studying these character traits, the ultimate goal is to become more like God.  

Ephesians 5:1 - "Be imitators of God, as beloved children."

The Bible tells us that God is faithful and we can read about how God demonstrates His faithfulness throughout the Bible.  He is faithful to us, and in turn, asks that we be faithful to Him.

FAITHFUL vs. unreliable

Acting with constant devotion and unwavering commitment to God and to those whom He has called me to serve.  

 Revelation 2:10 - "Be faithful until death, and I will give you the crown of life."

This week's Bible Story:
There is a reason why Abraham is so often called, "Father of the Faithful".  He was a man of remarkable faith and Hebrews 11 highlights many of the ways Abraham showed himself to be faithful, or unwavering in his commitment to God.  I recommend reading verses 8-12 and doing a quick review of when God called Abraham to go to a new land that he had never seen, when he waited for God to fulfill the promises made to him, including the promise of Isaac, the son born of Sarah. 

The main story I used to illustrate Abraham's faith is when God told him to offer up his son, Isaac, as a sacrifice.  Before coming back to read that part in Hebrews, we read the story in Genesis 22:1-18.  

On a personal note, this is one of the most difficult things God asked of any man in the Bible.  If I am honest about it, I cannot fathom being asked to do this, or comprehend God asking my husband to do this to my son.  When my children ask me, "Why?"  I have a difficult time answering.  I do not understand God's ways.  But this is what God did to test Abraham's faithfulness to him.  And because Abraham was unwavering in his commitment to obey the command of the Lord, God was faithful to him in return, and spared him from killing his son.  God provided on that mountain, just as Abraham had said He would. 

Hebrews 11:17-19 gives us some eye opening divine commentary on this story.  Verse 20 tells us that Abraham concluded that "God was able to raise him up, even from the dead."  As far as we know, no man or child had yet been raised from the dead by God, so there was not any previous situation that Abraham could use to help him make that conclusion.  But his faith was so great, he knew that if God promised his heritage would come through Isaac, and that if God, the creator of ALL, had been able to bring Isaac into being through a man and woman as good as dead (meaning deadness of the womb), then God could bring his son back to life.

Indeed, here Abraham demonstrates that "faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen."  (vs. 1)

Discussion:

• While discussing the definition of being faithful, I used a couple of visual aids.  The first is by holding my two hands, palms together, moving them slowly and steadily forward as I read, "constant devotion and unwavering commitment".  I would look steadily at each child in turn as I said this.  Then I demonstrated the opposite idea by moving my hands together with more of a swimming motion, showing them what it looked like to waver.  I explained that worst of all, was to turn our back on God and move away from him, again demonstrating with my hands.  
• My second visual aid was the drawing of the two hearts shown on our prayer board in the picture below.  We are doing some heart work lately as we are seeing a lot more whining and delayed obedience.  We talked about how the top heart is a pure heart devoted to the Lord, and while the bottom heart is mostly the Lord's, this heart has kept a little part of black.  It's just a little corner for selfishness, anger and ugliness, but that black part has been given to Satan.  That bottom heart is not a heart for the Lord.  Progress is slow, but I think it is working because the other night, one of them prayed, "God, help me to get rid of the bad parts of my heart..."  My eyes welled up thinking of his tender heart.   

•  We used the heart illustration again when discussing the story of Abraham offering up Isaac.  We talked about how God tested Abraham to see if he was keeping a little black part for Satan, or if his whole heart was faithful to God.  Have the children identify which kind of heart Abraham had.
• This "testing" is a challenging concept.  We talked about how God asks us to "Do hard things" and that those things will test our hearts.  God wants us to be faithful all the time - when things are easy and happy, and when things are hard and discouraging.  Remember God's promise - "Be faithful until death, and I will give you the crown of life."  
• Lastly, we really enjoy this song by David Pratte - God's Man, Faithful Abraham.  We've been singing it a lot this week.  Older children may enjoy singing Faith of our Fathers.

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Building Character: Goodness

As a family, we are studying a character trait each week, and are beginning with the Fruits of the Spirit. We are just getting started, so up until now, we have talked about Love, Joyfulness, Peaceable, Patience, and Kindness.  If you want more information on the nuts and bolts of what we are doing, you can read how to get started on this post.

This week's character quality is GOODNESS.  When one of the Littles becomes bent on "making trouble", we admonish with, "Do the good things" and "Do what is good and right".

Big Littles is full of questions.  I have heard the statistic that four-year-olds ask an average of 450 questions each day.  I would say this is a low estimate.  :)  Many Bible stories are about people who do not choose to "do the good things" but rather choose disobedience and evil.  Every time we read about someone that does not choose to do the good things, he asks, "WHY?  Why would they do that?" in such an earnest way.  The answers are complicated.  Why do people choose to disobey?  Why does he choose to disobey?  We talk about the nature of sin and temptation, but the main thing for him to understand is that everyone is given a choice to do good or to do evil.  Everyone that has walked on this earth, with the exception of Jesus, at some time has chosen to do evil.  (Romans 3:23)  God gives us a way to make things right again, but we need to constantly work on choosing to do what is good and right and work daily on seeking to do God's will.

GOODNESS vs. evil

Having a heart for the Lord and walking in His light.

Ephesians 5:8-9 -  For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light (for the fruit of the Spirit is in all goodness, righteousness, and truth).

As a secondary verse, we use one we had memorized a few months ago:
Romans 12:9 - "Hate what is evil, Hold on to what is good."  
(This translation is the Good News Translation and is also used in the New Century Version.  I don't typically use these versions, but in this particular case, I wanted to find one that was very, very plain and easy for them to grasp.) 

This Week's Bible Story:  Genesis 5:22, 24 and Genesis 6:9
I wanted to emphasize that goodness is "walking in His light" so I chose the two men in the Bible who are named as men who "walked with God". 

Genesis 5:22, 24 - Enoch walked with God
Genesis 6:9 - Noah walked with God

I think it is interesting that Enoch was Noah's Great-Grandfather (the lineage being: Enoch, Methuselah, Lamech, Noah).

We also sang the song, "Enoch Walked With God" from Each Little Dewdrop.

Discussion:

• It is interesting to speculate about how Enoch might have influenced Noah's faith in God.  We discussed our own heritage of faith and how valuable it was to have grandparents and great-grandparents walking in God's light to help teach us the way.  I know not everyone has this blessing, so if you don't, discuss with your children your determination to be a family that walks with God, teaching your children's children's children about the Lord.
• Discuss what it means to "walk with God".  What do we know about how Enoch walked with God?  What do we know about how Noah walked with God?  
• Drawing a simple visual of a path to heaven, with a stick man walking on that path is helpful in illustrating our walk as disciples of Christ.  Draw fiery darts and temptations along the path and point out that these are moments where the man must make a choice to do good or evil.  (We love the book "Little Pilgrim's Progress" by Helen Taylor.  We refer to the path traveled by "Little Christian" quite often!)

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"For His Own Glory"

A little something I wrote for the Littles.  We sing this almost every day during Bible Time.

I'm nitpicky, so it bothers me that I couldn't get everything just exactly the way I wanted it on the notation.  This was the best I could do notating my song on the free downloadable version of Finale Notepad.  Working with technology is a good exercise in letting go of perfection, is it not?  :)

Share it as you like - it is free to use "for His own glory"!  Just please don't publish it or sell it without my permission.

Hope you and the Littles that you love enjoy the song!
 
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Building Character: Kindness

As a family, we are studying a character trait each week, and are beginning with the Fruits of the Spirit. We are just getting started, so up until now, we have talked about Love, Joyfulness, Peaceable, and Patience.  If you want more information on the nuts and bolts of what we are doing, you can read how to get started on this post.

This week's character quality is KINDNESS.  Kindness is more than just "not being mean", it is actively doing good towards others, and that is the point that I think is most important for children.  Kindness is not convenient or accidental.  Kindness goes out of its way to show someone love. 

KINDNESS vs. meanness

Showing love and doing good towards others.

Romans 12:10 - "Be kindly affectionate to one another with brotherly love, in honor giving preference to one another."

This Week's Bible Story:  2 Samuel 9:1-13
I chose the story of David showing kindness to Mephibosheth because David goes out of his way to show him kindness when most men would not have done it.  2 Samuel 9:1 reads, "Then David said, “Is there yet anyone left of the house of Saul, that I may show him kindness for Jonathan’s sake?”

The amount of back story you need to cover will depend upon how familiar your children are with the time of King David.  Even if they remember, it would be helpful to briefly review the friendship of David and Jonathan (2 Samuel 18:1-3) and how Mephibosheth was injured (2 Samuel 4:4). 

At the very beginning of David's reign, he asked if there were any left of the house of Saul to whom he could show kindness.  King Saul and all of his sons had been killed at the same time during a terrible battle with the Philistines (1 Samuel 31:6).  It is remarkable to me, that David asked if there were any left of the house of Saul because King Saul had pursued him relentlessly for years trying to kill him.  Nevertheless, David always showed the utmost respect to "the Lord's anointed".  It was a blessing from the Lord that the one remaining descendent, Mephibosheth was the son of his closest friend, Jonathan, for whose sake he wanted to show this kindness. 

Mephibosheth was lame in his feet and according to the custom of the day, would not be fit to receive such an honor from the King.  Mephibosheth was conscious of this, and the fact that his grandfather Saul had been David's enemy when he said, "What is your servant that you should look upon such a dead dog as I?"  But David did not let past history or present conventions stop him from doing the right thing.  He explained to Mephibosheth that he wished to show him kindness for the sake of his father, Jonathan.  David promised to restore the land of Saul, his grandfather, to him, and said that Mephibosheth would eat at the King's table continually, just like one of his own sons. 

King David kept his promise to Mephibosheth and showed him kindness all of his days.

Discussion:

• Talk about what it means to "give preference to one another".  You can use the parable of taking the lower seat in Luke 14:7-14 to illustrate this. 
• Another example is to set out a bowl of treats for each child.  We have blueberries in our house right now, but use whatever you have.  Put an obvious amount of extra in one bowl.  Each child will want the bowl with the most blueberries.  Ask, "What does Jesus want us to do?  Would he want us to be selfish and take the bowl with the most treats for ourselves?"  
• Reward and lavishly praise outstanding acts of kindness you witness in your home for the week.  Another idea is to praise the child that gives a good report on one of their siblings.  (Kind of the opposite of tattling.) 
• Discuss what an honor it would be to eat at the King's table and what this would mean.  (The choices foods for every meal, abundance, being in the presence of the King every day, etc...)
• Was Mephibosheth able to return to King David the kindness shown to him?  Did David stand to benefit at all from his kindness?  If anything, there were probably men who thought he was crazy for inviting this lame grandson of his enemy to live with him and eat at his table.  David did it anyway, because it was the right thing to do.

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Building Character: Patience

As a family, we are studying a character trait each week, and are beginning with the Fruits of the Spirit. We are just getting started, so up until now, we have talked about Love, Joyfulness, and being Peaceable.  If you want more information on the nuts and bolts of what we are doing, you can read how to get started on this post.

This week's character quality is Patience.  Patience is a hard one for kids to learn.  (Hey, it's a hard one for adults to learn!)  The best way to learn is to practice! 

PATIENCE vs. restlessness

Quietly and steadily accepting a difficult situation from God.

Romans 5:3-4 - "And not only this, but we also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope."

This passage is a challenge to explain to young children and the context of this chapter in Romans is even more difficult to explain.  This is how I talked about it:  Our family motto is "Do hard things."  Tribulations are hard things.  But God wants us to be happy about doing hard things, knowing that when we do them, it makes us stronger so that tomorrow we can do even more hard things and we can do them better than we did today.  Doing hard things every day will give us strong character.  Having strong character will help us stay focused on the hope of heaven that God gives us through Jesus.

For this week's Bible Story I chose the well-known story of Noah because I knew my children would be able to somewhat relate to the patience Noah needed to have.  They are very familiar with the story, so we did not go over it in detail, but if you would like to do so, it is found in Genesis 6-8.

We focused on the part of the story where Noah and his family were inside the ark with all of the animals for almost an entire year.  We talked about how long it felt waiting for Big Littles to go from one birthday to the next and how hard it was to be patient.  We talked about the challenges of living in a small space with so many animals making noise, needing lots of care, probably getting restless themselves.  I asked them to imagine our house as the ark and asked them what it would feel like if we were not allowed to go outside of it for an entire year - no going in the backyard to play, no driving in the car, no going to parks and playgrounds...  I could tell that the challenge of Noah's difficult situation was sinking in and that they could actually feel inside themselves how hard it would be to stay patient while waiting on God to say they could leave the ark. 
 
Discussion:

• According to the definition, being patient means "quietly accepting" a difficult situation.  We are not being patient if we are complaining, whining, and grumbling.  
• Talk about how Noah was rewarded for his patience.  God brought his whole family safely through onto dry land again and made a promise with a beautiful rainbow as a sign of the promise.  We can trust that God will be faithful to us, we just have to be patient and wait on the Lord.  
• Ask for ideas of things we can do while we are patiently waiting on the Lord.  (#1 being to pray!  Also, reading God's word, serving others, etc...)
• For further reading, discuss Psalm 27.  If your children are restless, just discuss verses 13 and 14.  These words were not written by Noah, but it does seem like he would have had similar thoughts:

"I would have lost heart, unless I had believed
That I would see the goodness of the Lord
In the land of the living.

Wait on the Lord;
Be of good courage,
And He shall strengthen your heart;
Wait, I say, on the Lord!"

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Building Character: Peaceable

As a family, we are studying a character trait each week, and are beginning with the Fruits of the Spirit. We are just getting started, so up until now, we have only talked about Love and Joyfulness. If you want more information on the nuts and bolts of what we are doing, you can read how to get started on this post.

This week's character quality is being PEACEABLE.  There are two main aspects of this quality that I want my children to learn.  1) Inner peace that comes from our obedience to Christ 2) Living in peace with others.  This is one of the character qualities that I added, so I had to come up with a definition myself.  I struggled with word choice, so please feel free to make suggestions or changes to convey the message with more clarity. 

PEACEABLE vs. strife
A calm and tranquil soul, working to live in harmony with others.

Romans 12:18 - "If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all."

This character quality is especially useful in working on sibling squabbles.  We greatly encourage each child to actively seek out ways to make peace with his brother and frequently quote Matthew 5:9 - "Blessed are the peacemakers, For they shall be called sons of God."  Throughout the week, when the family gathers for meals, highlight outstanding examples of peacemaking you have observed throughout the day.  Even with the challenging vocabulary, using Biblical terms like "peacemaker" and "strife" makes a huge difference and gets the child's attention.   These kinds of words are only over their heads if you neglect to teach them. 

This week's Bible story is from Matthew 8:23-27, where Jesus is in a boat with His disciples crossing the Sea of Galilee.  Suddenly, a great tempest blew up and the waves started crashing into the boat.  The disciples were terrified of the storm, but Jesus lay in the lower part of the boat fast asleep.  The disciples woke him up saying, "Lord, save us!  We are going to die!"  But Jesus calmly said to them, "Why are you fearful, O you of little faith?" Jesus got up and commanded the wind and the waves saying, "Peace, be still!" (that bit from Mark 4:39) Instantly, the waters were calm and the air was still.   The men marveled, saying, "Who can this be, that even the winds and the sea obey Him?"  And who had the power to do this miracle?  Jesus!

Discussion:

• The disciples were terrified of the storm, did they have peace in their soul?  Why not?
• Discuss the instant obedience of the wind and the waves.  If you wish, have a sidetrack discussion on the importance of instant obedience.  (We can always use a review!)
• Talk about how strife and turmoil in your soul is just like that big storm on the sea.  It is upsetting.  How can we calm our minds?  (by increasing our faith) 
• This is also a fun story to act out during bath time.  :)

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Building Character: Joyfulness

As a family, we are studying a character trait each week, and are beginning with the Fruits of the Spirit.
We are just getting started, so up until now, we have only talked about Love.
If you want more information on the nuts and bolts of what we are doing, you can read how to get started on this post.

This week, we are talking about JOYFULNESS.  I especially like the operational definition of this one because it focuses on our spiritual state rather than circumstances in life that are out of our control.  Even when we are experiencing sorrow in our lives, we can have inner joy knowing that God has given us the gift of salvation.

JOYFULNESS vs. self-pity or sorrow -
Pouring out a happy spirit when my soul is in fellowship with the Lord.

The corresponding Bible passage we used is Psalm 16:11 - "You will make known to me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; In Your right hand there are pleasures forever."

I chose the Bible story of King David bringing the Ark of the Covenant back to the tabernacle in Jerusalem, where it was once again in its rightful place in 2 Samuel 6.  We talked about how the Philistines, enemies of God had stolen it (1 Samuel 4), but with God's help David was able to defeat the Philistine army (2 Samuel 5).  Now David wanted to bring glory to the Lord by bringing the ark back to Jerusalem.

The only problem was that David and the priests did not obey God's commands about how to handle the ark the first time.  They put the ark on a new cart pulled by oxen and when the oxen stumbled, a man named Uzzah put out his hand to steady the ark.  God was angry that Uzzah would disobey the command to never touch the ark and struck Uzzah dead for his disobedience.  David went from being joyful, to being sober-minded as he realized his terrible mistake.  The ark stayed in a nearby house for three months while David learned what to do.

Finally, David was ready to bring the Ark of the Covenant to Jerusalem and he was prepared to do it in the way God commanded, with the priests carrying it by the poles.  Along the way, David made many animal sacrifices to the Lord and David was so filled with joy that the Bible says that he came into the city dancing and leaping with all his might before the Lord.  There were trumpets sounding and shouts of joy, cymbals, harps and stringed instruments playing, and when the ark was set in its place in the tabernacle, David offered more animal sacrifices and peace offerings to the Lord.  Then David joyfully blessed the people of Israel and shared a loaf of bread, a piece of meat, and a cake of raisins with each person. 

David also wrote this Psalm to express his joy that day:  1 Chronicles 16:8-36
I suggest reading the first and the last part at the very least.  If the Littles are getting restless, this can be saved for a reading at another time of the day or for another day's Bible time.

Discussion:  Why did David want to bring the ark back to Jerusalem?  (Selfish reasons or for the glory of God?)  Discuss the difference between the first time David tried to bring back the ark when it was not done according to God's commands and the second time when it was done in obedience.  Which gave true joy?  Talk about the outward ways David poured out a happy spirit in this story - what things did he do to show his joy?

Joyfulness is discussed throughout the Bible and I'll be honest and say that I struggle with outwardly showing my joy.  This verse is one of my very favorites, and I try to keep it posted prominently to help me remember to keep a joyful heart no matter what my outside circumstances:

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Building Character: LOVE

Last week, I introduced a series I'm beginning on the blog on Building Character.  As a family, we are studying a character trait each week and I thought some of you might be interested in keeping up with it.  (If you want more information on the nuts and bolts of what we are doing, you can read how to get started on this post.)

We are starting out with the Fruits of the Spirit and are going in order, so week one, we talked about LOVE.


Fruit of the Spirit print from Grey Linen Shop on Etsy

The operational definition of LOVE that we use is, "Giving to others without seeking personal reward."  The opposite of love is selfishness.  All week long, we highlighted actions that we saw that were done out of true love.  It really challenged our incredibly self-centered (and age appropriately so) pre-school child to think about showing kindness when there was no benefit for himself.

The corresponding Bible passage we used is 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 -

"Love is patient, love is kind, and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.  Love never fails."

With our little ones, we emphasized that love is kind and that it does not seek its own.  We chose the Bible account of Jesus giving up His life on the cross to save us from our sins, the greatest example of love ever shown.

Working on these character traits with my Littles has been humbling as I realize just how much I need to work on my own shortcomings in these areas.  I still fail.  But with God's mercy and grace, tomorrow I will have a chance to try again.


Blessings to you, dear readers!

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Building Character: Getting Started

If you are interested in following along with our Character Quality studies, we'd love to have you join us!  In this post, I'm going to explain the system I have come up with that is working for us at this moment in time, but please feel free to adapt any of this for your own preferences or needs.  We have a pre-school child and a toddler, so I teach to their level, but any of this can be easily adapted.  As I said, I think I'm learning more than anyone, so this study doesn't have to be just for your kids!

We are adding a new character quality each week and I am adapting character qualities from this list.  I'm simplifying some of the language for my Littles and I also added the Fruits of the Spirit.  There are 52 qualities in all, so by the end, I hope to have an entire year's worth of studies.

We have been having a daily "Bible Time" after breakfast cleanup is finished.  I keep it between 10-15 minutes.  We pull out a blanket for the floor and clear the area of distracting books and toys for this time.  The Littles have the choice of sitting on the blanket or on the bottom stair just behind the blanket.  I don't insist that they sit perfectly still, but I do train them to stay in one place or the other.  (This is good practice for sitting in Bible classes and assemblies with other Christians both in our home and in our meeting place.)  Other than the blanket, I keep a Bible handy for each of us, and that is all we need as far as materials go.

Right now, the daily Bible Time routine goes something like this:

• Recite Deuteronomy 6:5-6 with hand motions
• Sing "We Are Part of the Family" from a collection of wonderful Bible songs called, Each Little Dewdrop
  (The CD is for sale here - we especially like it because it features children singing)
•  The body of the lesson happens here***
• I ask, "How did God create you?"  answer - "In His image" (Genesis 1:27)
• "Why did God create you and all things?" answer - "For His own Glory!" (Isaiah 43:7)  Then we sing the song I wrote to illustrate this:  For His Own Glory
• And lastly ask, "How will you bring Him glory today?"
• Then we all sing "Jesus Loves Me" - one verse or many

*** For the body of the lesson, I do different things on different days:
Monday - Introduce the character quality for the week and we talk about the definition, and the corresponding Bible verse
Tuesday - we do a Bible story and I try to tie in something with our weekly character quality
Wednesday - Review our Bible class lesson from Sunday
Thursday - Review the Bible story from Tuesday and our weekly character quality
Friday - Review our Bible class lesson from Sunday

 I am printing out an extra large index card for each character quality that looks like this:



As you see, the character quality is in large, bold letters on the left, while the opposite quality is in small letters on the right.  (The opposite qualities are every bit as valuable, I am finding!)  Next comes the definition, and finally, a corresponding Bible verse.  I plan to laminate these when I am finished, as we would like to continue this yearly cycle.  I like hand writing them out, but you can certainly make use of your printer.  I would suggest printing on card stock for the sake of durability.

At one end of our dining table, we put up a white board/bulletin board combo.  On the white board, we intend to keep a prayer list... still working on that one.  I tack up the character quality card of the week on the cork section.  Big Littles asked to keep "love" up there, so we did, at least for now.  This makes it handy to review our character quality, definitions, and Bible verses at meal times. 



 So that's basically what we do.  It's simple, really.  The hardest part is building the habit into our days... but the Littles are very helpful with that one!  They are quick to remind us when we forget!  :)

Do you have any special routines for some kind of Bible Time at your house?  I'm always open for new ideas!

Character Quality Studies posted so far:
Love
Joyfulness 
Peaceable
Patience
Kindness

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Building Character

Do you want to know how to have a great marriage?  How to do a great job raising your kids?  How to run your household well?  How to effectively reach others with the gospel? 

The answer to all of these is the same:  Have the right character. 

I have come to realize more and more that so many of life's problems would not be problems if I only had the proper character... the character of Jesus.  I can't change other people.  I can't force people to do what is right, no, not even my children.  I can only control one person and that is me.  So while I started out planning a study with my Littles on building character traits, I am the one who will benefit the most.  I'm sure of that.  Because after a challenging morning with a sad and distressing phone call, I sat down with my Littles for our Bible time and I brought out the character quality of the week:

Joyfulness - "Pouring out a happy spirit when my soul is in fellowship with the Lord"

God works in amazing ways.

So if you would like to follow along with our character studies, we'd love to have you join us.  I plan to post on our character quality of the week every Tuesday.  I am adapting character qualities from this list.  I'm simplifying some of the language for my Littles and I also added the Fruits of the Spirit.  Some were included already, but not all, and since Big Littles has had them memorized since he was two, I wanted to start with them.  Adding the rest of the Fruits of the Spirit brings the total up to 52, which just seems almost too perfect making it a complete year of studies. 

Come build with us!  :)

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