This Thursday, I am thankful for our Ladies' classes. It is the one group Bible study for the entire month that I get to really focus and have an open Bible, and even take notes! Now, I don't mean for this to turn into a complaining session... I am just deeply thankful that my Preacher Man takes the Littles for the hour or so and that I can focus my mind on the Word. I also enjoy my fellowship with the other Christian ladies - young and old and in between. It is a refreshing hour that I look forward to every month!
Do any of you other mamas out there feel utterly brain fogged... basically at all times? I do. There are probably several reasons for that, including the fact that I think it has been several years since I have had a FULL night of uninterrupted sleep, and a teething Little Littles has kept me up much more lately. The aforementioned constant distractions lend to that, but sometimes I just feel plain dumb, and in my pre-children days, I considered myself to be someone of greater than average intelligence. Now I have a difficult time getting my mind to work through tangles of thoughts. It's so much easier just to brush off challenging ideas and go the route of "ignorance is bliss". Some things, I have decided, are just not worth my time, but I try to keep my mind sharpened with thoughts that are worth thinking in hopes that one day I will be able to salvage my muddled brain.
Tonight, this verse jumped out at me and I was filled with such a strong longing...
Psalm 27:4 - "One thing I have asked from the Lord, that shall I seek; That I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, To behold the beauty of the Lord, And to meditate in His temple." (NASB)
In the past, I would have focused more on "dwell in the house of the Lord" or "behold the beauty of the Lord", but at this stage in my life, I long for that peace... to meditate in His temple...
Quiet.
Clear mind.
Meditating on the Lord.
Aaaaaaaah...
There are different seasons of life, and this is not my season for meditation in the temple, but I will not stop seeking it, and in the meantime, I will meditate in the shower, in the wee hours of the morning while I am nursing my baby, while I am pushing the double stroller down the sidewalk through the autumn leaves, and while I wash dishes.
Psalm 27 -
v. 8 - "Your face, O Lord, I shall seek"
v. 14 - "Wait for the Lord... Yes, wait for the Lord."
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